how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize