We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Randomize