i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
