so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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