Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
