I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
