Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
