i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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