And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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