redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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