dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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