ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Randomize
