i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
