Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize