Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
40s are totally the cure
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
