Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
