going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
