Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
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