Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
