Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
