I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Randomize
