When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
