My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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