So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize