she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
