I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
They have beer where we have blood.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
