I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
