one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
