you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
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