just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
You are a genius and a whore.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
