That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
