Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Randomize
