question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
