wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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