DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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