bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
