I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
