oh god the rape fog is back!
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize