I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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