i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
