There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
im holly from the hills drunk
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
