I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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