That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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