I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
