If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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