college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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