Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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