I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Randomize
