then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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