I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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