Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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